Until now, I have enlightened the world with my thoughts on jealousy and self-esteem.
I want to clear up any misunderstanding that some men might think I'm only targeting women here.
These are very sensitive topics.
No one wants to feel this feeling, but everyone has to.
Jealousy and self-esteem issues can imprison men and women alike.
No one is immune to real human emotions. Emotions know no face, color, size, or gender. There are two victims here, not just one.
I feel that I have also neglected to explore how the other party involved in the relationship suffers from jealousy or self-esteem issues.
A relationship is a partnership. It is a commitment between two people to stand by each other, through thick and thin.
Unfortunately, when it comes to jealousy, both parties are involved. We tend to focus more on the person trapped in the prison of worry than on the other in the line of fire, in part because we need to release that side first before we can help the other heal.
Well, now I too share the prison of hell.
Being accused and mistrusted by someone you love is a hard and definite pain that cannot be endured for long. Eventually, they will either leave or take a stand and tell you (the attacker) to stop; please listen to what you say and what you accuse them of.
From time to time, they try really hard to reassure you that they love you and don't care or want you. When they try to tell you that it's all in your head, they risk getting defensive. It is undoubtedly a vicious cycle.
They become paranoid that wherever they are, they are already convinced that they have been betrayed in some way.
They wait for the shoe to drop. Sometimes it lasts for a few days, sometimes it falls off immediately.
They have even less to sit next to and worry about when it will fall.
They fear they won't be able to say the right thing this time.
They fear that what they tell us will make us even more depressed and irrational.
They begin to feel "damned if they do and damned if they don't." I personally hate that feeling.
The thought of putting someone in that situation myself makes me want to run away faster than Forrest Gump.
The indifference you show towards that person due to your jealous insecurities is as real to them as the feeling of being trapped in a prison of doubt. There are many scenarios as to why people get jealous, but the innocent, who never actually do anything they want to fear, that they are the innocent victims.
People who have gotten to the point where they recognize their problems and start dealing with them, remember the other person who is with them. They too need special attention because they have shared your fears and pain. They are very different, but they still hurt.
Jealousy can destroy many good things in a person's life.
You can watch the video here.
It can destroy our couple, through you it will kill the one thing you love very much.
The worst part is that you allow it.
You have to stop!
So why do you allow this emotion to torment that which is so dear to you? Again, as long as your partner is not responsible for your fears or has made amends and is trying to make things better, please understand the pain of mistrust.
When they see you in pain and tell them it's because of them, they break down. Your partner loves you as much as you love them, and when they feel responsible for your trapped feelings, it eats them up inside. When they see you smile and feel loved, they feel good because they are responsible for that smile. That feels really good.
Also, make sure you don't let your jealous feelings make you unhappy.
Understand where they are coming from. Are you using them as a reason to get attention? Again, the wrong kind of attention. If you can't get enough attention, you feel like you're missing out, talk to your partner.
Don't let jealous feelings take over and get in the way of what you really want to say.
Any weakness in your mind is a direct path to negative feelings. Once they get there, they work very quickly to put you down. So be aware of exactly what you're feeling.
I hope I've opened up at least a few thoughts in your mind about what else happens in a relationship plagued by jealousy. Both sides are equally set on fire and killed.
We need to LIVE, LOVE, and LAUGH with each other more often. Oh and let's not forget my favorite...HUGGING!!!!
A thought from my heart to yours:
Say it out loud:
"I'm always ready to take risks.
I am always ready to learn.
I'm always ready to test my strengths.
And don't forget to go, and learn more awesome lessons from James Bauer, who is always inspiring me to do my best.
You need it! Click here and enjoy.